decide to take part in the Knitting olympics. After much consideration, decide on a project: fishnet stockings. These seem like an ideal project because A) I like tights and B) I am poor and they don't use much yarn. I already have a wide assortment of needles, so I anticipate spending around 12$ or so. I spend some time waffling between the SnB and Knitty versions and finally decide on the Knitty because they are (famous last words) more challenging and I have never successfully finised a pair of socks let alone a toe up variety. Other challenges include 4 different stitch patterns which increase the possibility of fucking this up...4 fold especially since I am pretty much unable to follow a pattern all the way through. Really the SnB version would be a better choice for me. however, in keeping with the spirit of the Knitting Olympics- I am up for the challenge.
Challenge #1: getting the yarn. The patterns call for Cascade Fixation and Elann something something which are in essence the same yarn, containing 98.3 % cotton and 1.7% Elastic. The elastic is the important bit. I head to Romni wool where I am fully expecting an entire wall devoted to this sort of yarn, a virtual cornicopia of colour for my stocking making needs.
I head to the sock yarn section and find nothing, I circle the store several times and find it lacking in anything of the elastic variety. I ask a sales person, explaining in perfect detail what I need and why I need it and she proceeds to show me 8 different yarns that are in no way suitable for making stockings: including soy silk and bamboo yarn which runs around 22-24$ a skein. I thank her and try to slink away but she herds me downstairs to the sale section where I circle like a trapped goldfish for a few minutes until she turns her back and I hoof it out of there.
I start to panic. If Romni doesn't have the yarn, will anybody? I jump on a bus going north in order to check out a yarn shop I've never been to before and low and beold, she has the Cascade at 7$ a ball. The colour selection isn't the best so I choose 3 balls (better be safe) of a slightly varigated pink. Total 21$ plus tax, and 3 TTC tokens. (6$) for a grand total of 32$.
Challenge #2: the cast on. I get home and realize that I don’t have the proper needles. SnB calls for size 4 and 5 straights (have no 4s) and Knitty calls for 3.5 dpns (nope) . I decide to make due with what I have and knit a gauge sample. The knitty needle size must be a mistake because I got her gauge with 4.5s which is the appropriate size according to the label.
Cast on: weird: figure 8 style….it took me at least 8 attempts. Realize I knit wrong.
Starting knitting in pattern. Go to pub for opening ceremonies, feel like Im coming down with something.
Drunken knitting bad: lost a casein dpn (suspect someone stole it- one minute it was there, I turn my back, it disappears- we never did find it.
Knit away: screw up pattern, don’t care. Keep knitting, who knew a room ful of knitters would be so loud.
Next day: sick as a dog. Possibly the plague.
Keep knitting, get to heel. Instructions stupid. Seek help, people keep telling me why to do it but not how. Stupid. Proceed anyway, get to the bit where I have to switch to straight needles, realize what a stupid idea this is, knit a few rows, realize I’ve screwed up the stitch pattern, unravel the thing, re do the heel several times, always looks the same.
Decide I hate this pattern and try the Snb one which is really more me: 80’s/ Siouxsie Sioux versus, where as the Knitty one is pretty baroque: the best little whorehouse in the Moulin rouge. With lacing in the back. Frankly even if I do finish them, I will never wear them.
In between waiting for a phone call, being sick and languishing in despair for several days, I work on the SnB stockings. But wasn;t completely in love with them, Today I picked them up and realized that I was knitting them wrong and that they would probably look different if I did them correctly. Unraveled the whole thing and started again. I doubt I will finish them for the closing ceremonies